"Communication: It's A Skill"
Linda Saul
You have just hired an outside consulting agency, a new employee, or joined a board of directors at a nonprofit. Being excited about the position or organization is great, until you have to start keeping in contact with other committee members, that new agency, etc. Because you may be a strictly e-mail person, you may make assumptions that do not hold for the other person.
E-mail is quick, convenient, and can be sent any time from anywhere—the same for a text message. However, at some point in time you will actually have to have a real conversation with another person—during that conversation you can get a true reading of the person’s feelings and intentions; hearing the inflection of the voice—this is something that can’t be deciphered in an e-mail. In fact, sometimes you have to guess at the meaning behind the e-mail—if the message is written in all caps, or in short, terse sentences (which seem to convey displeasure or anger), you may misinterpret the meaning. How well can you really know someone when you limit yourself to electronic communications only? In person is the beginning of the conversation—whether it is by telephone or at a meeting or conference.
Starting The Conversation
When you do start that conversation with the other person, you must be open to becoming an active listener. Sometimes we are too busy thinking about what we are going to say next. We inadvertently block out the other person’s voice and miss out on hearing their thoughts. In getting ready to have your say, you may be filtering out the other person’s responses. This eliminates the possibility for real communication, and you may miss the solution to a problem.
Asking Open-Ended Questions
In getting an answer to a problem, another person’s point of view, or hearing a more detailed explanation, asking opened-ended questions will enable you to draw out a more detailed response. Stay away from questions that will elicit a “yes” or “no” answer. Adopting the open-ended question approach will give you a better rapport with a committee member, or a new employee. For example, in getting a reference about a possible new business relationship instead of saying “would you rehire that person or use the person’s services again,” instead ask what attributes made that person (employee, board member, consultant) valuable to your organization?
By not jumping in before the person has a chance to respond to your questions, you will also put the other person more at ease and give them a few minutes to think through their answer. In person you can become an active participant in conversations through your body language—i.e., lean forward in your chair; nod in agreement, and ask for additional information after their response. These small actions can speak volumes about the level of your own communication skills. In the end, better communication skills can translate into a more harmonious project management team, good employee/employer relations, and a prosperous fundraiser.
Linda Saul is a grant writer for Round-The-Clock Nursery, Inc, NYC’s only 24 hour/7 days a week NAEYC accredited childcare and crisis nursery.
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